That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize