C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize