Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Randomize
