You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
When are your genitals available?
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
