return my video game
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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