I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize