Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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