Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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