Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize