doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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