I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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