The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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