do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
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I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
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I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home