Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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