I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Randomize