On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Randomize
