UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
