Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
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how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
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