Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
