so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
