Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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