just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
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the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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