escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
