You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
