I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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