Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
