apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
