i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
worst night to have a conscience
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize