There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
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