Everything about him screamed your future.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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