Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
