and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
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