Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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