Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
