last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Redeem this text for a blowjob
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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