he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
