Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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