hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
