haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
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