yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
