Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
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