before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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