Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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