yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Randomize
