Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Apparently you make a good broom.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
