grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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