A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Randomize