hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
