sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
