Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You ruined the universe
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
